Dwelling
I dwell on things.
Big things,
Little things,
Insignificant things,
Petty things,
Tapping on the table things,
Heavy things,
Weight of the world things,
Weight of a feather things,
Papercut things,
Things hardly noticed,
Things that sting,
Heart shattering things,
Things of sorrow,
Things of tomorrow,
The future things,
Counter clockwise things,
Have no control over things,
I wish I had a time machine things,
Things to undo,
Things I need to shoot,
Things to burn in a fire,
Suicidal things,
Heavier things,
Hateful things,
Vicious things,
Blood tainted things,
Suffocating things,
Things that consume,
Things attached to an anchor,
Untouched by the sun things,
Foggy things,
Dense things,
The heaviest of things,
Wish I didn’t give a shit things,
Things that know I’m weak,
Things I wish I could speak,
Things I wish I could delete,
Things that force me to think,
Surrounding my every thought things,
The things I dwell on
Are
The things I dwell in,
Cornered,
Hands up,
I never stood a chance things.
***
A Haunting
Anxiety haunts,
You don’t ever see it,
But you feel it,
Like static electricity,
an inner ferocity
Which travels through
My lungs-
Inhaling,
My heart-
Pulsating,
My voice-
Hesitating,
My brain-
Panicking,
Ferocious panic remains–
My brain,
Insane
Asylum,
My brain,
Secret craze,
My brain,
A chain–
Locked,
My brain,
Tentatively
Brave,
My brain,
Causing pain,
My brain,
Cocaine,
Movement trained
To be
Ashamed,
My brain,
Thoughts flowing–
Unclaimed,
My brain,
Afraid,
My brain,
Blames,
It’s all my fault,
I cause,
Which in turns effects,
I am diseased,
Which in turn infects,
I think
Therefore dissect,
And there,
Lying in a dish,
Scientifically
Dismembered,
Rendered useless,
My brain
A trial,
Not the breakthrough
My brain
A drop of paint.
Not the masterpiece,
Just a drop
Just a sample,
Honestly,
Just nothing.
My brain–
A static electricity
Which only I feel,
And no one else discovers,
Until I recover,
Write
And share–
I welcome you
to my
ghost stories.
***
Inspired by music lyrics, Diana Ramirez’s love of poetry began as a teenager. She has recently been inspired by the raw and thought provoking poetry of various spoken word artists. She stepped out of her comfort zone in 2016 by creating an event called Words Come to Life, poetry-inspired art aiming to inspire at-risk youth. Her drive to make her vision come true came from her two boys and showing them what it is to follow your passion. She is a college student majoring in Human Services and a board member for the Arts Council of Kern and Bakersfield Parent Nursery and works for local non-profit organization CASA. Her most influential and inspirational teachers are her boys, ages seven and four.